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Among the many myths and assumptions surrounding the value of good communication and its accessibility, here are five top fallacies that hinder success, countered by the realities that challenge them, writes Leah Mether.
British wartime prime minister Winston Churchill is quoted as saying: “The difference between mere management and leadership is communication.”
Yet, despite its critical role in fostering relationships, driving leadership success, nurturing high-performing teams, and cultivating thriving cultures, misconceptions about effective communication persist.
Among the many myths and assumptions surrounding the value of good communication and its accessibility, here are five top fallacies that hinder success, countered by the realities that challenge them:
Myth 1: Communication ability is innate. You’re either good at it or not.
Reality: Communication is a skill, not an inherent trait. While some people may have a natural talent, like any skill, communication can be learnt, refined, and developed, no matter what your starting point. There are two big provisos to this, though: IF you’re willing to learn and IF you’re willing to do the work. Improving your communication skills won’t just magically happen, and you won’t get good at what you don’t do. Consider the colleague who initially struggled to convey ideas effectively in meetings or the person who was terrified of public speaking but invested their time in developing their skills. Through a dedication to learning and improvement, consistent effort and practice, these people can be transformed into confident and articulate communicators.
Myth 2: Communication is a soft ‘fluffy extra’ skill. It’s nice to have but not essential to my success; my technical skills are more important.
Reality: Communication and human connection underpin personal and career success, particularly in today’s rapidly evolving workplace. As automation and artificial intelligence reshape job roles, the ability to connect, collaborate, empathise and convey ideas – both in person and often across virtual platforms – has become increasingly important. While technical expertise remains valuable, it’s effective communication and emotional intelligence that sets us apart from the robots. These essential human skills are what we need to harness if we want to future-proof our careers and stay relevant as technology continues to advance. Technical brilliance is not enough on its own anymore.
Myth 3: If I’m good at my job or have been promoted to a leadership position, I must know how to communicate and, therefore, don’t need to waste my time further developing these skills.
Reality: Improving your communication is a process, not an end result. Communication skills are not something you’ll ever perfect or be able to tick off as “done”. Leaders need to be humble enough to recognise this, self-aware enough to know the areas they need to work on, and persistent enough to strive for continual improvement. No one is a perfect communicator; everyone can improve, even (and often especially) senior executives. Many intellectually intelligent and technically brilliant people are terrible communicators, as are many people who were promoted into leadership based on their subject matter expertise or years of experience rather than their ability to connect or lead. Whether you’re a CEO or a new starter, an executive or a first-time leader, everyone can do better, and no one gets it right all the time.
Myth 4: Other people need to communicate well with me in order for me to communicate well with them. If people didn’t anger, frustrate or upset me, I’d be a good communicator.
Reality: Good communication isn’t about other people; it’s about you. It’s about taking personal responsibility for your behaviour and communicating in the best way you can, regardless of what the other person is doing. Improving your communication requires an inside-out approach: you must lead yourself first. You can’t control how other people react, but you can control you. Regulate your emotions, choose how you show up, and take personal responsibility for your own communication – with no room for “yeah, but…”, or denial, blame, and justification. Model the behaviour you want to see in others and remember that your communication is contagious, so while you can’t control how someone else communicates with you, you can influence others based on the example you set.
Myth 5: You have to be a certain type of person to communicate well (smart, educated, extroverted, and confident).
Reality: Not true. Effective communication transcends personality types and backgrounds. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, and individuals with diverse strengths and communication styles can excel. It’s not about confidence or extroversion; it’s about courage, clarity, curiosity and kindness. Effective communication is accessible to all, regardless of title, education, or personality. Even nervous introverts with no formal qualifications can communicate well if given the right foundations.
Regardless of your position or skill level, investing in the development of your communication skills is essential for career advancement and success in relationships. By challenging these pervasive myths and embracing a growth mindset focused on continuous improvement, you pave the way for clearer, more impactful interactions in every aspect of your professional and personal life.
Leah Mether is an author and communication specialist.
