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Balancing work and personal commitments has taken centre stage in wellbeing discussions, but one busy professional says sexual empowerment should also be prioritised.
Members of a professional networking group said the need to juggle parenthood, work and personal obligations left them with little time for sex and intimacy, and now they are ready to learn how to make it a priority again.
Connecting Lawyer Mums founder and principal of Gallant Law, Lauren Cassimatis, said lawyers consumed by clients and files said not only have their sexual needs been neglected but they have also started to feel “always apologetic for wanting to explore intimacy again”.
“Wellbeing has definitely become a focus in the law lately – however, they’re also looking for more niche guidance and support around issues such as dating again, being a single parent, body confidence and feeling psychologically safe when engaging in intimacy.
“Whether a parent or not in a busy profession like ours … it seems you either neglect your needs sexually or they feel they can’t prioritise that because they have to prioritise families, work, clients, colleagues, and employees,” Cassimatis explained to HR Leader’s sister brand, Lawyers Weekly.
Having heard this feedback, Cassimatis, with medical expert Dr Mike Shenouda, psychologist Laura Lee, and Anna Grosman, a sensual empowerment advocate and founder of Her Confidant, a male escort service, will deliver three Sexy in the City events across Australia’s east coast.
The event has been designed to address the issues professionals of all genders face when it comes to intimacy, with advice from experts such as a sexual medicine specialist, and psychologist and sexologist.
So far, the idea has excited legal professionals, with one sharing she has struggled with confidence in the wake of her divorce, and another explaining her pregnancy left her feeling physically worn down.
Another woman who experienced sexual trauma told Cassimatis she has wanted to restore a positive focus on sex for her wellbeing.
In addition to advice on how to prioritise sex and intimacy, Cassimatis said the experts would also delve into affirmative consent, navigating unwanted pressure, and feeling confident with saying no.
“As busy working women and parents, we are often feeling like we have to please others, we have to look after our spouses, our kids, our clients, and sometimes, it becomes a bit like you’re on autopilot.
“In terms of keeping this aspect of our lives, we must prioritise ourselves and know when to say no and feel OK with that,” she said.
While Cassimatis is keen to challenge the taboo around sex – and particularly the stigma of women pursuing intimacy – she shared she is not “naïve to the fact there will be some talk about it”, particularly from people who will wonder why she has chosen to run this event.
Cassimatis said she likes to “challenge the status quo for the better”.
“I feel like this is a good cause, an important cause, and why just focus on general wellbeing when we can explore other facets that are equally important? This is one that is really important,” she said.
It is also one of the reasons Cassimatis gravitated towards the partnership with Grosman, who went “out on a limb” to start a company that was built around women embracing sex and intimacy.
Asked about which topic she is most looking forward to discussing, Cassimatis said it was the intersection of pressures and knowing when to take certain hats off to focus on personal wellbeing.
“Don’t leave all those balls in the air,” Cassimatis said.
“Some of us even struggle to get to the gym or make time to see friends because we’re so consumed by work and families, and so sex sort of gets down the bottom as well – so how do we accept within ourselves that we deserve it and we need it and it’s good for us, and make this work in the context of a busy life.”
